Monday, June 18, 2007

Simpituosity.

When I was a very young girl, I enjoyed singing along with commercial jingles on the radio. There was one jingle in particular that I loved. It was for BOAC, or British Overseas Airways Corporation (now British Airways).

"BEEEEEE OHHHHHH AAAAAAA CEEEEEEEEE
TAKES GOOD CARE OF YOUUUUUUUUU
TAKES CARE OF YOUR MON-EEEEEEEYYYY"

This is how I would sing it:

"BEEEEEE OHHHHHH AAAAAAA CEEEEEEEEE
TAKES GOOD CARE OF YOUUUUUUUUUU
SIMPITUOUS HIGHWAY!"

I have no idea how I created that word or what it meant, but my lyric fit very nicely in the phrase of the jingle, don't you think?

My sisters, of course, pounced on "simpituous", and now in family lore, it means "fake word or phrase used in a manner which suggests correct usage of word by the speaker/singer, ALTHOUGH IT'S A FAKE WORD OR PHRASE".


President Bush is a master of simpituosity. His two most famous simpituous words are "strategery" and "decider". These are excellent examples of simpituousness, executed according to Family Lore Guidelines.


Another great example of simpituousness is a person who called into a local radio station and confessed that she used to think the hook for INXS' Suicide Blonde was actually "soup and salad bar." Imagine Michael Hutchence writhing on stage and growling:

(bass line) DUH DUH DUH
SOUP AND SALAD BAR
DUH DUH DUH
SOUP AND SALAD BAR
SOUP AND SALAD BAR
WAS THE COLOR OF HER HAIR... etc.

From Jimi Hendrix:
'SCUSE ME WHILE I KISS THIS GUY

Lesson: when listening to a song, it's key to consider context.

I'm interested in hearing my readers' personal examples of their simpituosity. Please share in the comments section below.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well, of course I just had to wade in here as one of the founding mothers of simpituosity. In "Maggie May", Rod Stewart belts out:

"I suppose I could collect my books and get on back to school.
Or steal my daddy's cue - make a living out of playing pool.
Or find myself a rock and roll band that needs a helpin' hand.
Oh Maggie I wished I'd never seen your face."

It took me A LONG TIME to figure out that third line ISN"T:

"Or find myself a rock and roll band.... I need your helpin' hand."

In fact, it took 36 years. The song came out in 1971 and I just caught on in April.

Livin' the simpituous life! -- the Redhead

T-Bone said...

You know, it's really weird using the word "simpituous" these many years and then seeing it actually spelled out. It looks like a real word.
Oh well, Redhead. Your example isn't SO bad.

T-Bone said...

BTW, isn't the song "Maggie MAE"? I dunno. HAHAHAHAH

Anonymous said...

No, it's "Maggie May". You can bet that I checked that when I checked the lyrics. I feel like such a dope for all the times I sang lustily along in the car while the driver gritted his/her teeth and carried on.

The Scarlet Pervygirl said...

There's a song by Barenaked Ladies that contains the line

"Do you hear Del Shannon's 'Runaway' playing on transistor radio waves?"

I heard it as

"Do you hear delshannons running and playing on transistor radio waves?"

I thought delshannons were creatures that lived in sound the way we live in air, and made up a huge mythology about them, including the fact that you can pet them by striking tuning forks.

Laney said...

I posted on this and it didn't seem to show up so I thought I would do it again.

Manfred Mans Earth Band
Blinded By the Light

"Blinded by the light, wraped up like a douche, she was a roamer in the night"

is really

"Blinded bythe light, reaved up like a duece, she was a runner in the night"

Or The Eagles
Life in the fast lasne

"Wipe in the vasoline, slowly makes you lose your mind"

is really

"Life in the fast lane, slowly makes you lose your mind"

Or Thomas and my favorite
Trace Atkins
Honky Tonk Bedaungkadonk

"Donkey Kong, Wears a Monkey Thong"

is realy

"Honky Tonk Bedaungkadonk"

BTW from what I am told a bedaungkadonk is a finlly shaped ass on a woman

YoBimbo said...

My partner's mom used to sing, "Lucy in disguise as Linus," instead of, "Lucy in the sky with diamonds."